A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and Says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know
you'll forgive me."
She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in Room 221."
One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts
rubbing his wife's arm.
The wife turns over and says "I'm sorry
I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay
"The husband, rejected, turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls
over and taps his wife again. "Do you have a dentist appointment
Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for
a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife
he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis
His wife suggested that he should see a sex
talk about it, but Bill said he would be too embarrassed. He vowed
overcome the compulsion on his own.
One day a few weeks later, Bill
home and his wife could see at once that something was seriously
What's wrong, Bill" she asked. "Do you remember that I told you
had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer"
Oh, Bill, you didn't" she exclaimed.
Yes, I did." he replied.
My God, Bill, what happened"
"I got fired."
"No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer"
Oh...she got fired too."